The description makes me sound so noble. *smile* Or perhaps it seems flattering to me because it's an accurate outline of my moral structure. But I don't know that it's really true. The test doesn't check for certain things; it assumes one's beliefs are consistent from day to day or hour to hour.
I worry that I will never accomplish anything, because it appears to me that in order to accomplish a goal, one must have faith in the validity of one's actions, or faith in the usefulness of the objective, or a strong desire to adhere to a system of belief; and I'm just not that sort of person. I see a system of belief and I rip it apart, I vivisect it. I find the flaws and I beat on them until it all falls apart. It's not something I do out of belief, it's just what I do. It's involuntary and increasingly uncontrollable. I'm aware that even my own orientation has nothing solid to recommend it, that I'm sticking to it because it gratifies me to do so. I wonder sometimes if it's the open-minded people who are flawed, if one has to be ignorant or narrow-minded or paranoid or xenophobic in order to really get anything done. I don't want to have to be like that.
Incidentally, check out my other blathering (http://www.livejournal.com/talkread.bml?journal=postvixen&itemid=171348&thread=1181524#t1181524) about the value of reason....
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momijizukamori
no subject
Date: 2002-08-23 00:42 (UTC)I worry that I will never accomplish anything, because it appears to me that in order to accomplish a goal, one must have faith in the validity of one's actions, or faith in the usefulness of the objective, or a strong desire to adhere to a system of belief; and I'm just not that sort of person. I see a system of belief and I rip it apart, I vivisect it. I find the flaws and I beat on them until it all falls apart. It's not something I do out of belief, it's just what I do. It's involuntary and increasingly uncontrollable. I'm aware that even my own orientation has nothing solid to recommend it, that I'm sticking to it because it gratifies me to do so. I wonder sometimes if it's the open-minded people who are flawed, if one has to be ignorant or narrow-minded or paranoid or xenophobic in order to really get anything done. I don't want to have to be like that.
Incidentally, check out my other blathering (http://www.livejournal.com/talkread.bml?journal=postvixen&itemid=171348&thread=1181524#t1181524) about the value of reason....