Brief observation

[chipotle]

So I'm tweaking the horror story and thinking I've got to make this suck more. And it occurred to me that this is about the only genre where that's a positive thing.

...Of course, I mean "make this suck more for the characters," but it's still sort of perversely amusing to be looking critically at the text and thinking how do I maximize the gut punch effect without increasing the word count?

(N.B.: thanks to shaterri the story's tentative title is "Carrier.")

Comments

[revar.livejournal.com]

I dunno. I think that 'Carrier' as a title is a bit of a give-away.

[shaterri.livejournal.com]

Well, keep in mind that at the start of the story she's delivering/guarding the one person known to have survived the syndrome...

[chipotle.livejournal.com]

Well, the reader learns the story is about an epidemic pretty early on in the proceedings, so I'm not sure I'm giving too much away by giving it a title that one can connect back with a disease. (In a slightly newer rewrite, "carrier" is also echoed a bit on the first sight of the ferals: one of the workshop comments was, in effect, that it should be a little clearer that the ferals are the infected ones, not that the world has both civilized and wild anthros in it.) If there's a mystery aspect to the story, it's about learning what the disease's effects are.

[kynn.livejournal.com]

Horror story! Whatcha gonna do with it?

[chipotle.livejournal.com]

The initial target is Eurofurence's program book. Beyond that I'm not sure.

It is furry, as that would imply, and the conceit was taking a relatively common horror trope and giving it a specifically furry take. I think it worked well overall, although doing it in under 3000 words has been a challenge. I still don't absolutely know that will fit in the space they're giving me, either!

[kynn.livejournal.com]

You should send something to Clarkesworld sometime.

[rikoshi.livejournal.com]

So I'm tweaking the horror story and thinking I've got to make this suck more.

And you didn't ask a fox?

Nah, seriously, I hope that the feedback you got on Monday night was helpful. For what it's worth, I think you can definitely do what needs to be done with it.

[chipotle.livejournal.com]

It was definitely useful feedback, yes.

I was working at Barefoot Coffee yesterday for a few hours after lunch, and noticed your car there, although not you. That was vaguely mysterious!

[rikoshi.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the person I carpool to work with (3catsjackson) and I are both Barefoot addicts, and since it's located roughly halfway between where we both live, we usually just meet up there in the mornings, and then we both take one car into the city.

But yes, you're not the first person to fall victim to the Barefoot Rikoshi Fakeout.

[kereminde.livejournal.com]

I would like to see this when you are finished, without possibly needing to go to Eurofurence. After all, I don't have a passport NOR the money :P

[kereminde.livejournal.com]

Having just gotten a look at it . . . I find it interesting. It's almost like an episode of the Outer Limits, short succinct and with most of the details which prevent fridge logic from stepping in and ruining the experience :)

It also, as with Outer Limits, ends on an ominously "this is not good" note. That's probably what made me think of OL first; Twilight Zone is a little more supernatural and surreal, though no kinder to the people involved.

This makes me want to dust off my writing pad and work a little bit of "fanfic" I was thinking on earlier.

[tommicat.livejournal.com]

Oh dat reminds me. I need to work on a zombie idea I thought up.

[chipotle.livejournal.com]

As long as it's not too much like mine, that's great. ;)

[toob.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the name is great, actually.